Death vs. the mall
In a recent OFGS reader poll, you overwhelmingly voted for death over spending a week at the mall. In fact, 100% of voters chose death. Thank you all for voting. I commend your taste. Now, it's time for a new poll:
Miller: unfunny vs. creepy
Once upon a time, Dennis Miller was funny. He was great as the host of Saturday Night Live's "Weekend Update." And he came up with that great "Rants" gimmick, which was one of the smartest comedy bits of all time. But after 9/11, Miller's brain broke. He quickly devolved into a bigoted, narrow-minded jingoist, pandering to the red-state Bible thumpers, cracking jokes that portrayed all Arabs as terrorists, and desperately trying to lend neocons street cred. Of course, it didn't work. Just as the neocon agenda crashed and burned, Miller's career became a comedy Baghdad: he got cancelled, cancelled and cancelled again. The problem wasn't that his idiotic political stance was untenable. It was something even more unlikely: Over the course of just a few short months in 2001, Dennis Miller, once of the smartest, funniest people in showbiz, stopped being funny.
Now, Miller is getting his just desserts. He's signed on to do a game show on the Game Show Network, the place where washed up performers go to become high priests of consumerism while sexually harassing their hand-model co-workers. He's also hosting a right-wing AM radio show, where he'll be forced to listen ad nauseum to the wackadoo views of the gun-humping, racist, anti-science cretins he used to make fun of on SNL. A Vicodin addiction, three divorces and a 100-pound weight gain are just a matter of time. It's hard to say which is more mystifying, Miller's blind march toward fascism or his inexplicable humor drought. This week, OFGS wants to know: